If you ever get cold, just stand in the corner of a room for a while. They're normally around 90 degrees.

[vile8r]

I just heard my company's going to fire the employee with the worst posture. I have a hunch that might be me.

A courtroom artist was arrested today for an unknown reason... details are sketchy.

[Rachel_Thornton]

I accidently swallowed a bunch of Scrabble tiles. My next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster!

What's the difference of deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are a $1.75, but deer nut are under a buck.

[vile8r]

I accidently swallowed a bunch of Scrabble tiles. My next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster!

   a merit for that Rachel! 


What happens when business slows right down at a medicine factory?   You can hear a cough drop.

My girlfriend said, "You act like a detective too much. I want to split up." "Good idea," I replied. "We can cover more ground that way."

[vile8r]

 Well, I got fired at work today. My boss said my communication skills weren’t up to scratch. I didn’t know what to say.

My wife told me: "Sex is better on holiday." That wasn't a very nice postcard to receive.

[vile8r]

I got a new job at the Heinz pickle factory. Got fired for sticking my fingers in the pickle slicer. She got fired too.

So how do you explain to people that your on the sex offenders list for eating Branston  Pickle

[Rachel_Thornton]

I'm addicted to buying old Beatles records. My boyfriend said it sounds like I need help. I told him no, I already have that one!

[vile8r]

Little Johnny was in sex ed class. The teacher asked him how he viewed lesbian relationships. He said, "In full HD!"  He got sent to the principal's office. Apparently that wasn't the right answer.

I'm addicted to buying old Beatles records. My boyfriend said it sounds like I need help. I told him no, I already have that one!

Only a merit can make that bad pun go away!

People who punish others with bad puns need to be severely pun-ished

[vile8r]

The Alphabet kids were out playing in the yard.  J got stung by a B, and K poked D with a golf T. Mama Alphabet came out and said, "Stop that before someone loses an I and I have to spank U."  Q said, "O I have to P."