[ObsideousPrime]

Suicide....

   It's one's personal decision. On when, where and how to end one's own existence.
   It's not a thing to be taken lightly, however it's a very personal thing, thus perhaps thought of by others usually as a selfish thing to do.

   All a point a view.

   But it's a matter of personal choice. Many never understand nor accept this, the motivations, as above all they are not the one that is ending his/her life. Each of us is an individual.
   The ones left behind, the aftermath of any suicide, full of sorrow with a tint of confusion, anger and betrayal. Understandable entirely indeed....

   Suicide is an act commonly undertaken due to extreme mental anguish and agony. A condition empathised with by people around the person contemplating such an act, and many say and live in hope that medical aid may cure all.
   Yet. Often, medical aid is mostly selective and vastly incompetent. The patient usually knowing a lot more than, say, psychiatrists assigned to treat them.
   It is not a case of weakness or courageous, right or wrong, giving up or not, misguided or not, as often, an argument can be made both ways...

   Traditionally, attempted suicide is largely a last ditch delay and a scream for assistance. The ones who feel, rightly or wrongly, they do not have the assistance they want or need, often go on to become successful cases of suicide. These are ones no-one could have foreseen nor prevent, and are acts carried out by determined individuals believing death is the only way and is far better than continuing to breath.

   Death is final. Ghosts, hell or heaven, whatever...but death is final physically. There is no coming back. Which makes to be quite appealing to those that are sick of plodding on in life for whatever reason.

   There is a certain stigma to suicide. Implanted into Western society by religion. The belief that those who commit suicide would face eternal damnation.
   In the East, mostly it's seen differently. In Japan, it used to be considered an honour and duty among captured or defeated Samurai warriors, and a legitimate ending for rape victims. In the Middle East, everyone's rather familiar with the concept of suicide bombers.

   "All life is precious and worth living" ...a debatable concept pending on circumstances.

I am not sure any of us qualifies to even know enough to address the subject.  I think it is a basic human instinct to want to live. period, and yet, there are times when life is so rotten, and existence is painful that is seems the only alternative.

One one side of the coin, one would have to be in extreme mental or physical anguish to even consider it.   On the other side there are those who can help you get there.  Doctors administering fentanyl or morphine in the last stages of life for example.   The medicine will ease the pain, but it will also destroy the body in short order depending on the doses given.  Dr. Kavorkian and his miracle shots.  Teens take their own lives because they are bullied and feel life is not worth living, and to me this is a national disgrace.  No one has the right to demean another person to the point they have no desire to live.

It's a morbid subject to be sure.   If someone wants to die so badly because they are terminal and there is no cure, that is one thing, but for people to check out because they feel there is no other option is a failure of everyone around them.

Darklord, you make a lot of sense. That a terminally ill person would want to speed up the end is understandable. But teenage suicides are such a waste. Those of us who are over 30 can look back at our own teens with a wry grin.  Why did such and such an event seem so overwhelmingly important way back then?

I've stayed up all night to talk someone out of suicide. The despair and desperation one feels to drive them to that point must be felt to be understood. We have been taught that suicide is a perminant solution to a temporary problem.

I've seen that type of desperation and despair, and have experienced it Myself. It took a LONG DAMN TIME for Me to get back on a stable enough mental footing, and become a productive member of society again......

Between My Wife, and My Faith, plus a close circle of Brothers and Sisters to keep Me level.

Trust Me, once you have been that far low, it is surprisingly easy to fall back that low again.......


Tony V.             

I have studied this for 4 years. And Darklord said it better than I could myself. It was perfect, especially the last sentence....

" If someone wants to die so badly because they are terminal and there is no cure, that is one thing, but for people to check out because they feel there is no other option is a failure of everyone around them."

Some use suicide threats as a weapon to gain. Some use the word because nobody hears their pleas. Others do not warn or cry suicide because nobody would hear anyway, or at least they're convinced of that. Those who say nothing..no warning.. those are the very ones we need to see and hear. Sometimes it isn't "what they say"....more what they don't. Sadly, most people go through their busy lives with blinders on. They see maybe? But don't have time today...or some other excuse.


Please don't take this the wrong way. But the person who cries suicide, is not the unsafe person. They are getting closer to it than they should be, but they're not the one in danger. It's the person nobody sees..or hears...

And to build off Dawn...when it is said people commit the act because medical aid is often incompetent, there’s another component that must be acknowledged—even when in front of medical aid, the individual does not always state their exact thoughts and feelings. There’s a combination of shame, of fear, of the belief that if the doctor/shrink/whomever hears what I’m REALLY thinking, they will judge me rather than seek to help me.

Much like PTSD or depression or other mental ailments, the person must truly want help, willing to leave their ego at the door. Sadly, that doesn’t always happen...

[Hazard]

When the few remote tribes left of undeveloped peoples are asked about suicide, they literally have no concept for it. It makes no sense to them, or so I've seen on two separate documentaries.

Our society is a lonely place. That's the root of the problem. The people who can't understand suicide (sometime friends are like "wtf?! Why would someone kill themselves?") are fortunate enough to have not experienced the isolation of modern society.

Also when people say "suicide is selfish", I think that shows their naivety and their own selfishness. Suicide isn't about anyone except the person who kills themselves. Sure, we can all say "What about the people who are left behind? The family? Why didn't they think of them?" etc. but that's a ridiculous thing to ask. It's like a man standing in someone's lounge with his jugular pissing blood all over the place dying and someone else asking "what about that other guys carpet?". Fucking ridiculous.


  

[fantasybear369]

I don't know if anyone will read this reply, given the age of the post, but I feel compelled to respond.

I've been in that cold, lonely vacuum. Twenty years ago, I sat in my patrol car and didn't even know how much trouble I was in until I realized I was trying to figure out how best to use my duty weapon to end everything. I was a mess due to childhood mental abuse and a long time with a guy who abused me worse than my family did. Sprinkle on some really screwed up things I'd seen on calls, and I was a ticking time bomb.

I get how easy it is to fall into that pit. The walls are sheer and steep and you can't get a grip to pull yourself out. The loneliest I've ever felt in my life was when I decided not to kill myself that night because I didn't want to leave a mess for someone to clean up. That realization was soul crushing.

It took me years to finally deal with it, after having a crisis again. I worked with a therapist and finally realized that my depression and anxiety, and occasional suicidal thoughts, are just a part of me. I've learned to recognize the signs and developed healthier coping mechanisms. I am a huge advocate of Peer Support in my current profession.

I will never look down on someone who is at that critical point. There are many cultural perspectives on suicide, and I respect that. People have a right to live as they wish. But I can guarantee that I will always take the time to extend a compassionate hand to anyone who's stuck in that pit.