I've been diagnosed as having Asperger's Syndrome, but have my answers and qualifiers anyway...
Were you known as a clumsy child, or did your physical movements tend to be controlled by your conscious intellect?
Clumsy, but medical reasons other than Asperger's contributed to this.
Were you known as someone who had a large vocabulary at an early age? Often used BIG words?
Yeah; I read a lot and used words I'd seen in books.
Did you seem to have a much better than average memory?
With the qualifier above that the memory thing seems to be excellent selective memory; yeah.
Did you tend to miss the point of other people's satire or humor, and they often miss YOURS?
Yup, definitely.
Were you teased as, or thought of as, 'different' than the other kids? Strange?
Yeah. School wasn't fun.
Were you sometimes told by others that you came off as "PHONEY"?
I dunno. I remember that people tried to 'help' by saying 'we'd like you if you changed' but no one could/would? actually say something like "if you offered to fuck us after dates instead of keeping your legs closed". If they had, I would've had a clue as to what needed to change.
Were you bullied or teased a lot in school?
Yes.
Did others tell you (or did YOU notice) you seem to lack empathy for the feelings of others?
I think I was told?
As a child, did YOU hate to be touched (held or hugged), or did either of your PARENTS avoid physical contact?
I didn't like to be touched except by certain people, but this was not wholly due to Aspergers.
Have you tended to have a very small set of, maybe just one or two, close friends?
Yes, definitely. A part of this is due to finances--I don't have money to go out as much as other people would like, and this has tended to mean that I'm not worth bothering with.
Had trouble waiting 'your turn' when talking?
Uh... I think the answer is yes, but I grew out of this/learned better eventually. May still be prone to the *hear comment, blurt out relevant fact* thing, which is sort of like this question's purview.
Often been told you speak without inflection, or in a monotone?
I think so?
Do you often avoid looking at others in the face?
...I want to, but I really can't.
Do you tend to have a small set of very technical interests, at which you greatly excel?
...yes.
When you explain stuff to others, do you often have difficulty in knowing when to stop?
Depends mostly on the subject.
Have you been told you have a tendency to stare?
Does it count if it's boobs? :-P Uh... hmm. I guess maybe I might 'stare' at someone in that I am looking in their direction but I am not looking at them as such?
Is your handwriting slow, blocky, or deliberate?
My handwriting is a fucking unreadable mess. So yes, if I want it to be readable, then it has to be as above.
Do you often get excited about little things? Or have a tendency to overreact? Trouble letting it go?
Yes, I can get excited about little things, but from my perspective they're not little to me? Like for example, I've heard that Jason David Frank and Amy Jo Johnson (original Green and Pink Rangers) have a cameo in the 2017 Power Rangers movie. To me, this is a freaking awesome throwback to the original series, yet others might go "eh, whatever". And I SQUEED at the closing credit scene with Tommy's green bag and the teacher being all "Tommy Oliver?" Because OMG WHAT A GREAT TEASER FOR THE NEXT MOVIE.
...so yeah, I probably proved that one. :-P
The way I read the second question... I feel like it's asking if one overreacts without real cause? And while I likely did so in childhood... I feel like, as said in an earlier answer, I grew up/learned better eventually.
Let me put it this way: I'm lucky enough to not be allergic to anything, but if I were allergic to shellfish, say, and I told my boy/girlfriend this, yet every time they made dinner for me, they forgot I was allergic, I'm going to blow my stack eventually, and to me, this is not an overreaction as such because it's a reaction to the constant disregard of the boundary I've explicitly requested over and over be respected.
Do you tend to sometimes blurt out something inappropriate?
...probably. And I usually don't realise it is until too late.
Chronic Anxiety, Depression (especially adolescent), nonverbal Learning problems, Obsessive-Compulsive (OCD), Social Anxiety?
Chronic depression since before adolescence, a perhaps on the nonverbal learning problems, and maybe slight social anxiety? I really do prefer one on one...
Extended periods of laughing or crying without apparent cause?
Honestly, not sure. It's equally possible either way.