This is a fictional alternative history of my first time (found here -http://ravishu.com/forums/index.php?topic=42133.0 ) remotely exploring this kink to an adjacent degree. I, in real life, took some very stupid actions that could have resulted in a different result for me and this is an erotic look at such an alternative. Please, for the love of God, do not try to duplicate my experience the way I did. There are much safer avenues like Fetlife to explore ones issues and kinks and I happily recommend those. This is not intended to be fully realistic but an exploration of fantasy while I sit around the house today. Real rape is horribly abusive and traumatic. All that said now, enjoy
Alternative Histories 1: by Badsammie
I scrolled through the messages I had gotten back on Craigslist one more time. I thought I had settled on the man I planned to meet, and had almost replied back, when the urge had hit me to look through everything one last time. He seemed safe, but something was niggling the back of my mind and I couldn’t place why. So, venturing through all the replies that had seemed promising, I pulled up what had been my backup.
“I am very interested in meeting young women like yourself who want to be used. I’m glad you are exploring yourself and want to find what you were truly born for. Msg me back and I’ll teach you exactly what you are.”
It was a simple message all things considered, but I was both attracted and nervous about the tone presented within. I had role-played online the past couple of years with multiple men who viewed women as objects to use, even hurt, and I had found in my limited experience they seemed to fall into two broad categories. Men who wanted ladies on the street and skanks in the sheets, or those who felt, clearly deep down, that women were cumrags to be used. While the latter could be fun to roleplay with, they scared me as they truly did not see me as human like they did. Both of my “finalists” gave a bit of that vibe, but I didn’t want anyone who felt too hardcore like that. And now I was having second thoughts about my initial pick. Listening to my gut, I deleted my message instead of sending it, and instead sent an initial message to the backup.
Thus started a few weeks of cautious back and forth, usually a message a day, of “negotiation”. First and foremost was proving who I was, and I did so, sending him a picture of my face, along with my email and he returned the same. I made sure to delete our messages afterwards, because the last thing I needed was anyone finding out about my planned activities. I’d only had sex once before and it had been a mostly disappointing affair that left me empty and unsatisfied. My stress level had been so bad I had been having more panic attacks, and I just felt depressed all the time. The only time I could escape myself was online, and they weren’t enough anymore. I needed it for real. Maybe then I wouldn’t come home and just cry as more expectations were heaped upon me without end.
Eventually, he pushed me hard about my body and I sent him a picture and short video of me in my panties and bra, he’d told me to write whore on my stomach to prove it was real and not just an old picture and I did, feeling my stomach twist in guilt and excitement. He greatly enjoyed that and wanted me to send more, but I was beyond paranoid that any pics could get out. So I told him no and the reason why and surprisingly, he relented. I had prepared to be badgered and he quickly let it go. He did bring up us meeting and I told him I’d get back to him. I did, indeed the next day, asking him to meet me at a nearby Wal-Mart. He instead suggested a McDonalds a bit further away, but I said yes.
Excited, I masturbated myself to dirty fantasies of what would come, which would ultimately prove beyond unrealistic. I picked out my clothes for the meet, a nice short dress, low cut, no bra, but a thong and nice flats. I then worked on constructing a cover story for where I would be and started to put everything in motion. Three days later, I did.
I found myself that Saturday, alone, hiking along the roadside down to that corner of town to meet him. Thankfully it wasn’t too hot as I was mortified at the idea of me being soaked in sweat when I arrived. I hit the parking lot and as I headed into the building, I heard someone yell out behind me. I turned and recognized him, driving a nice crossover. He flashed an attractive smile and waved me over. I went to him and he asked if I wanted to chat first, just in the van. I hesitated but I felt in the parking lot I was still pretty safe, so I agreed and got in.
I was happy with his appearance, lean but muscular, dark from working heavily in the sun. We chatted a bit, and beyond kissing my cheek and undressing me with his eyes and touching my knee, he wasn’t being very forward. I’d almost expected something else considering his tone online. Instead, he was very pleasant and we chatted with the windows down for easily thirty minutes in his car. We talked about life, education, the world, and sex of course and how I got to be where I was. Then, after a bit, he leaned in to kiss me, gently, but firm. It was a kiss I happily returned. We didn’t break the kiss for nearly a minute, and then parted, almost panting. He stroked my cheek and told me he really liked me and he thought it would be so dirty for me to give him a blowjob in the car. I thought about it nervously, caught off guard by the sudden suggestion, but I did like him already and it wasn’t like my mouth was virgin. Indeed, I had already given multiple blowjobs and found that I very much enjoyed the act.
He put the crossover into drive and unzipped, and I leaned over, lapping at his cock. It had a strong, musky scent and tasted of salty sweat, but it wasn’t unpleasant. He slowly drove around as my head bobbed in his lap, feeling like the dirty little slut for doing this. This was some of the excitement I was missing and wanted. I felt him, after a few minutes, begin to tense up, and I prepared to swallow his cum and I felt a sharp pain in my butt cheek. I tried to pull up but he shoved my head down and the world grew dark as cum filled my throat.
The next thing I felt, was sandpaper scraping my back. At least it felt that way. My body was moving, not of my own accord, and I felt like a great weight was on me. And my crotch hurt, bad. I started to focus and opened my eyes and nothing made sense. I was on my back, on concrete, in what looked like a half finished house. A stranger, a large black man, was on top of me, pounding away. I started to scream and he covered my mouth and started pounding harder, ramming against my cervix, making me sob. He held me down effortlessly until he grunted, ramming me deep as I screamed into that hand, filling me with his seed. He pulled out and let me go, jerking me up and wiping his cock with my hair.
Dazed and confused as I was, I noticed things. We weren’t alone. There were several men around me. I had a puddle of cum between my legs and my entire body ached. I doubted the black man had been the first. I couldn’t see the sun, but I knew some time had passed. I wanted to scream but only cried when another man, another tanned white man, came over and shoved me down. He spit in my face and lifted my legs and slammed into me and the ground dug into my back. He basically folded me in half and fucked me against the floor hard, while men took photographs and videos, and called me names. He stiffened and dumped his load in me, slapping me hard as he got up.
I begged for someone to help me, but a large fat man flipped me over, spread my ass, rubbed something cold on it and shoved in. My screams were barely human then and I heard a piece of construction equipment turn on and drown out my voice. I didn’t know it then, but the only reason he was able to shove it in was that he had been the third man to rape my ass. All I knew was that my guts felt like they were being torn apart as he mashed my head to the ground, bit my neck so hard I started bleeding some and rutted in my ass until he came.
It went on like that, man after man, just holding me down and fucking me, no, using me. I was nothing more than a cum dumpster and no one acted like they cared for me at all. Soon I was bleeding from my back, my breasts, my knees, my neck, as I was tossed about, bit, and clawed at. Some point after my next anal rape, I came, and they couldn’t stop laughing and taunting me. I even laughed at myself then, although hysterically. Something broke inside me, and when the Craigslist guy walked over me, I cried and laughed.
He laughed too as he leaned down, whispering into my ear. “I told you I would show you what you are. You’re nothing but rapemeat,” he told me as he started choking me. He pulled me up onto him, making me straddle him as he choked me, fucking into me as he strangled me, his eyes barely an inch from mine.
“I told them all what you wanted, what you needed, I showed them your pictures you stupid little whore. We’ve been laughing at you for weeks, getting ready for this. You’re gonna be fucked out and ruined after today. You look like hamburger and you’ve cum like a cheap cunt because that is what you are. You know it know deep down, I’m sure you always suspected, but know you will never doubt it. You’re a warm set of holes, nothing more.”
As he told me this, black wavered around the edges of my vision. His grip tightened my breathing and pulse slowed, as he bucked into me. I was pushed onto his chest and someone filled my ass, crushing me between the two men. I tried to reach out for someone to help me, but I couldn’t lift my arms anymore. I spasmed without control as the world turned black.
I woke later, as hot piss streamed down from nearly a dozen men onto my battered body. Some just aimed from my chest, but several seemed to aim for either my crotch or my face and hair. I choked on the acrid taste, the strong sour smell, as I was drenched. It burned in my dozens of small cuts and someone jerked my head up and finished in my mouth, holding my nose until I was forced to choke it down. I coughed weakly, as my face was shoved in another man’s ass and made to lick his filthy ass.
Starting to get bored, they got creative, fucking me with hammers, the rubber grips digging into my gut as they rammed it in my ass. My ass got beat with their belts and other object, whipping me until I bled. My final indignation was two men holding my arms and they lifted me up to a 2’x4’ sawhorse. Another man held my hips as the man from the ad took a very small but terrifying nail, and hammered my nipple to the wood. I screamed uselessly around the construction equipment, as he took my other nipple and did the same. Then, one by one, most of the men fucked me again. I was in complete shock by then and barely noticed when they had finished. I was still numbly humping against cocks that weren’t there, my nipples swollen and bleeding. He pulled out the nailed with pliers and I dropped to the floor, broken.
“So, what are you?” he asked me.
I couldn’t even look up, I didn’t have the strength. I was beyond broken.
“A set of warm holes,” I said, unable to even cry anymore.
He smiled at that and dragged me to his crossover, and drove me to his home. There he washed and scrubbed me, cleaning the outside of me. I knew what he was doing though, removing evidence. Deep inside nothing could scour me and even though he dropped me off at my home that night, I never really left that half finished basement.
Instead, I sit here, pretending to get drunk and piss off angry men, and I think, and I remember, and I feel once again.