Author Topic: She  (Read 3674 times)

Offline browneyedgirl98

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She
« on: May 20, 2018, 05:18:35 AM »
This is in the POV of a male for this story. Let’s call him Jeremy, he lives in an apartment with one other male roommate. Any additional details about the set up will be disclosed throughout the story. Real names will not be used.

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Im friends with a previous coworker (Andrew) who I still hang out with outside of work. He’d come to my place and hang with my roommate and I, whoever was home and vice versa with his roommates. Andrew lives with another couple as well as his girlfriend (Janelle). This will be centered around mostly her, she’s who I want. These are mainly going to be entries in no particular order of our encounters, and fantasies of what I know won’t be likely to happen. I don’t think I could truly bring myself to do anything to my friends girlfriend.

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My roommate (Devin) and I decided to invite Andrew and his group as well as another couple over for a night of some smoking, drinking, and gaming. Things started off around midnight, and in came the guests, Im engulfed in a current movie on the TV until I hear her cheery greeting specifically for me. I love hearing her say my name. I snap out of my trance and look in her direction, greeting her back, taking in her appearance. Baggy jogger bottoms hung off her waist and her top was a cropped black camisole that hugged her nicely, she definitely wasn’t wearing a bra. She dresses so effortlessly but still makes an impression on the eye, my eye. Everyone found their seats and was pleased to see that room on the couch she had her eye on was at its limit, having her come sit in the chair next to mine, a small table and lamp separating us. She cheerfully greets me again, and I pick up that she’s already somewhat intoxicated, its written all over her face, her eyes were glossy, and her smile was present, my heart sped up a bit. Tonight was going to be interesting, I’ve never seen her like this. She takes her seat and greats the animals as they approach her, I return to my movie.

Things get started, blunts, bottles, and controllers go into rotation. Conversations are held, and I feel a light tap on my arm, my neck stiffens for a short moment, she did that. “Hey Remy, Im sorry to ask you but could I please get some water?” I let out a winded laugh at her manners and agree to her request and head to the kitchen. I eye her occasionally from the bar counter in the kitchen taking in how each pull and shot gets her fucked up, more and more. Longer moments of spacing out, bursts of giggles at the simplest jokes. Im not sure if it was her, or the state I was in but I was starting to get very hungry.

I head back to deliver her water, taking my seat again as she leans over to grab it from me, a glimmer through the fabric underneath her shirt catches my eye, I turn to look for a quick moment, careful to not get caught by the others conversing across the room, and see the glint of silver as she leans back into the chair. Jesus Christ, her fucking nipples are pierced. I feel a slight stir in my pants and don’t have to question if that turned me on. I break the gaze and pick up a magazine. Time passes and I feel her tap on me again, she asks if she can look at my comic books she spotted, I nod and point her to the shelf across the room. I peer over the one in my hands and watch her walk over to pick one out, she’s swaying slightly with each step, its hitting her harder and harder. She squats down and my eyes immediately drop to her ass. I realized Ive been staring a little too long when Devin calls me, giving me a look that I can only think meant, “dude, cool it” I give a facial response and return to my book. My roommate is very aware of my attraction to Janelle, as he has one as well, its just not as hungry as mine, and because he is also cool with Andrew, its not a line either of us want to cross we both keep our distances, I try my best.

Another tap on my shoulder, I look over at her ready for her energy, this time she asks me for directions to the bathroom. I’d love to get up and take her there myself, but I know better. “Through the door on your right.” She thanks me and heads that way, I fight to not watch her leave, I keep my gaze glued to my book until she leaves, then I can relax. Seconds pass and I head to the kitchen, Devin had previously stuck a frozen pizza in there earlier and I need to satisfy at least one of my hungers. I leaned up against the wall in the kitchen, savoring the pizza. I sat there zoned out for a moment until the sudden movement of Janelle exiting the bathroom brought me back to reality. My eyes locked onto her as it was just us and no one would see me eye fucking her where we were standing. She walked out and looked me right in the eye, and I know the way I was looking at her was anything but innocent or friendly. I was starving. She didn’t seem to notice, she did another double take registering me there and jumped a little, her fear lasting only a second, then giggling, guessing she felt silly being startled by me so late in reaction. It was in this moment, I realized I hadn’t blinked, my chewing slowed, and I threw what remaining sense I had out the window. Fuck it.

I whispered over to she before the walked too far into the living room, I had to make this fast. “Janelle.” She turns at her name, I gesture to her with one finger doing the “Come here” motion to which she obeys me. Im pleased, and so is my partner in my pants. She stops within arms reach and smiles up at me, “Yeah?” Her breath smells like green apple. I lock eyes and hold them to make sure Ive got her attention. “Hold still.” I slowly bring my hand up to her face and caress her cheek, rubbing it with my thumb. She doesn’t move, she holds her gaze and lets out a little laugh, Im surprised she’s still standing with how much is in her system. I tilt her chin up to me and pull her closer, and rub my thumb across her lips, they’re full and pouty, I would love to see them wrapped around me. The moment of truth comes when I circle my thumb over her lips, seeing if she’ll know what to do next, she does. She parts her lips slightly allowing me in, and starts sucking my thumb gently. I’m rock hard at this point, clear as day, we cant go back in there, not now, not like this. I have to have her, I have to satisfy this. I hear movement headed to the kitchen and break contact with her, sending her dazed back into the living room, she bumps the corner of the wall and almost running into the oncoming traffic in the kitchen. She’s wasted. She probably isn’t gonna remember that, damn, there goes progress. That actually just happened, the least thing Id expect. I cant take it. I head to the bathroom to take care of my wood, I cant get it to go down on its own, it knows better than me what I want. I'm disappointed I didn’t get a chance to take advantage of her suggestible state, and no clue when another opportunity will be just given to me like that so easy. Damn.
« Last Edit: May 20, 2018, 09:00:30 AM by browneyedgirl98 »

carhamgrater
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Re: She
« Reply #1 on: May 20, 2018, 07:01:50 AM »
Great Story! Please tell me this is just part one and that more is to follow!

Offline browneyedgirl98

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Re: She
« Reply #2 on: May 20, 2018, 10:47:51 AM »
Great Story! Please tell me this is just part one and that more is to follow!

indeed. :angel:

Offline browneyedgirl98

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Re: She
« Reply #3 on: May 20, 2018, 11:28:53 AM »
I meet the eyes of my roommate Devin, who had gotten up to investigate my disappearance, he instantly gave me a disapproving look as if he knew what I'd done. I raised up the pizza and my other hand as if to say that I wasn't doing anything, he could see through my lies. "Are you fucking kidding me man?” I seared back at him to keep it down. “She’s drunk dude, you’re really going to try her? Here? Now?” I leaned back on the wall and really thought about it. I brought my eyes back to him with complete seriousness, “Yeah, I am.” I knew Devin wanted to be on my side, but didn’t want to condone something so risky. “Are you going to help me? Or am I going to have to do this myself?” Again, it had been a minute since I’ve blinked even once through this entire exchange. Devin was still unresponsive.

 “Well?” I couldn’t read his face, I didn’t have time to wait for an answer, the night wasn’t getting any younger, Andrew would see his girlfriend was really feeling the effects and eventually take her home, he’d be getting to do everything I couldn’t, I felt my face growing hot. “Fuck it man Ive got it, go.” “I’ll help you Remy, but you owe me.” I raised my brow, “Owe you? Owe you what?” “Her.” “Fuck no man are you serious? That’s mine.” I growled back at him. He stood his ground, I didn’t say tonight, but when another opportunity arises, I want it. There was a long pause between us before I spoke. What did I want more? Her? Or him not going where I once was? I peered over at her from the opening through the doorway, she was taking another swig of the bottle passed to her, her coordination was a little off and watched as she spilled some of what she was drinking down her shirt, she giggled off her embarrassment and started towards the bathroom. Time to act. I felt the rush growing as I turn back to Devin who was still waiting for an agreement.

“Done, go out there, start a game with Andrew, keep him distracted, keep him busy. I can work with about 12 minutes before I feel others will start to investigate. Tell them I had to lay down for a moment, that Im trying to hold my liquor. You got that?” I look over his shoulder as Janelle passes him on her way to the bathroom, smiling and waving at us. She was such a friendly drunk, and she doesn't even know it's getting her into trouble. I wanted to jump on her instantly, I was so, fucking. hungry. Devin replies to me and heads off to put our plan into action. My heart was pumping I swear all I could hear was the beat. I took a deep breath and fully accepted that I was going to do this, I took another deep breath and became cool and collected, taking my place outside the bathroom door.
« Last Edit: May 20, 2018, 06:06:32 PM by browneyedgirl98 »

carhamgrater
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Re: She
« Reply #4 on: May 20, 2018, 12:47:28 PM »
Like how you are setting this up, like a conspiracy between the room mates.  Very creative!

Offline browneyedgirl98

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Re: She
« Reply #5 on: May 20, 2018, 02:09:58 PM »
Fuck. What was my plan? Do I go in there, or do I take her by surprise when she goes to leave, with the second option I’d risk her screaming, I don’t need that. I quietly turn the knob on the door and walk in. There she was, patting her chest in an attempt to clean her spill, my eyes glued to her as I approached. She turned to me and I stopped, she didn’t scream, she just gazed at me, tilting her head in confusion, she was so clueless. I felt like the big bad wolf, and she was little red riding hood. Her riding me, what a pretty picture, it was enough to send me over the edge, to really set me off. I closed my eyes and let out a long sigh, god how I wanted to take my time with her but this was going to have to be quick.

I open my eyes and plant them on her still standing dazed beside the running sink, I didn’t know if I needed to move fast or slow to avoid a fight but time was ticking and I was running out of choices. My kindness leaves me as I charge her, grabbing her face and pinning her back to the nearest wall. I leave the sink running, I’ll need that extra noise. Fuck the bill. Her eyes widen with many emotions, surprise, fear, betrayal, my hand is clamped tight over her mouth, I wasn’t about to fuck this up, I needed her quiet. Small whimpers escape beneath my hand and I shush her reassuringly. Tears well up in her eyes and she makes a grab for my hand weakly trying to pull it away from her face. She shakes her head and whimpers some more, pleading with her gaze. It only makes me want her more, poor girl, she’s really setting herself up for me. I remember from a previous conversation with Andrew that her neck is a “yes” area for her, a detail I hung onto, never thinking I’d have the chance to use it, this is it.

I push my body up against hers making sure to press my wood against her, letting her know exactly what my plan was. This raises a more frantic struggle to which I extinguish by licking, sucking, and biting on her neck, I feel her resistance fade some and she sags down a little, her legs not being the best support at the time. I continue the play on her neck and let my other hand do some exploring, seeing how far she’ll let me get. I remembered my time and reminded myself that it couldn’t take this slow. Her whimpers turn to small breathy moans, thank you Andrew. I bring my hand down to her neck and squeeze, hard, her lowered eyes widen at her sudden air cut off, her eyes asking me why.

“You’re wet, aren’t you Janelle?”  She freezes beneath me, confirming my accusation and I quickly go to investigate, she’s soaking. My heart beat quickens and I let up on my grip, but still keeping her well acquainted with the wall behind her, I begin to finger her and feel her knees buckle, the only thing keeping her standing is me at this point. Studying her facial expressions, taking it all in, I stop and pull the string on her pants, them dropping to the floor, her fashion choice has really made things easy for me. I linger over her maroon lace panties, the only underwear she has on beneath her clothes. What an appealing color on her, mine now. I rip them off her effortlessly and shove them into my pocket and begin to undo my belt, I feel her struggle beneath me as she tries to squeeze out her words. “Remy, please…” she says trying to get free, “Gladly.” I smirk back. More tears overflow out of her eyes and she continues to plead with me, they’re so small the sink running drowns them out. “No…no Remy, don’t” I ignore her and position her in front of the counter, facing the mirror so that she could see me lining myself up behind her, time to do damage. “Remy, n-“ I tighten my grip on her neck cutting her words short, I know what she’s going to say and I don’t want to hear it.

I lean forward and growl into her ear, “Remy yes, say it.” I glare into her eyes and don’t break the stare, I tighten even more and repeat myself, her being too drunk to go without air for long gave me what I needed. “Remy, yes.” With that I pushed into her, watching her face contort in pain, despite her wetness I was stretching her wider than she was used to and it fed my ego. She was so tight, I savored every inch I was into her. She let out a long whimper and shut her eyes, and I let go of her neck to send one across her face and held it in front of the mirror.

“Look at me, keep those eyes open Janelle I want you to see this.” I drive myself in and out of her hard, her ass jiggling with impact, pushing small moans out of her, I take in the in the entire scene in our reflection, what a dream, her panties in my pocket making it all real. How much time had passed? I had to hurry up. I checked my phone with my free hand to see if Devin had sent me a heads up, coast was clear. I lifted her shirt and stood her up to get a good look at her piercings, they were fantastic. I groped and mauled at her breasts, my release building up, another idea struck, I took my phone back out and held her up to get a good picture, making sure  you could see me inside her from behind, “Look at the camera Janelle,” I demand. She rolls her eyes over to meet the camera and I snap the picture and show her. I say nothing as I put my phone away and continue drilling her.

I reach in front of her and circle her clit, she tries to retract but only pushes me into her further, what a predicament. She accepts my touch but tries to stifle her more prominent moans, I lean forward and grab her face again holding it to the mirror, “Lets not forget why we’re here Janelle.” Her arms reach back trying to weakly push me away, and I show her how she’ll need them more to support her on the counter to keep her face from hitting the mirror, I remember I cant leave anything on her lasting and move my hand from her neck back over her mouth and pound her even harder, frustrated I have restraints of my own. I circle her clit faster and faster and her breath quickens with my pace, I coo into her ear, “Cum for me.” I speed up some more and repeat myself “Cum for me Janelle, you love this, you want this.” I feel myself getting close too, I don’t plan on puling out, Im aware she’s on birth control due to previous trips to their guest bathroom. I got nosy.

I groan when I feel her sex pulsate around me and grip me harder, she’s close, I don’t let up. “Give me what I want Janelle, cum for me.” She sweating so much now, her breaths climbing through my hand. I bury my nose in her hair and catch a whiff of her scent, mangoes? No, peaches. I groan again, closer. I lock eyes with her in the mirror, she’s still stunning even with tears running down her face, an arm comes in contact with me again, she’s moaning faster and faster and pulls my shirt hard. I feel her tense up and convulse under me, I know that was strong, the sounds she made were a symphony of pleasure as she tightens harder around me “Yes that’s it, thats it, fuck!” I groan between my teeth and I blow everything I’ve got into her, she stiffens again and I know she feels all of it, Im satisfied.

I let her go and watch her sink, a blank stare targeted to the floor. I clean myself and her up and pull her clothes back onto her still heaving body, now isn’t the time to be a complete savage. She crawled over to the toilet and began throwing up, I almost get upset thinking thats how she felt but remembered she had been drinking and this experience was enough to make her sick, I'm sure her mind was reeling, but I don’t really care. This was perfect, her state could easily be explained with her puking in the toilet, no extra work there. I turn the sink off and exit the bathroom leaving her to collect herself.

I head back to the festivities as the others ask if I was doing okay. I reassured them and joined the fun as if nothing happened. Janelle appears about 10 minutes later, her face still strewn and raises immediate questions, I freeze. All eyes were on Janelle, except for Devin, his eyes were on me, and he didn’t look too happy. My eyes don’t leave Janelle and she avoids my eye taking her previous seat next to me, I smirk a little, she knows better. Andrew pipes up, “Baby, are you okay?” All eyes are on her now, “…yeah, I just felt sick while I was in there and had to throw up, sorry for the scare.” This puts everyone at ease including me, I look over at Devin, his line of sight fixed on the game now, I know I’ll be hearing this later. I scan the room to make sure no one is still studying Janelle and I turn to her, pleased with her response. I say low enough for only her to hear, “good girl.” She sinks further into her seat and gives a slight nod, her eyes still in her lap. She belongs to me now.
« Last Edit: May 20, 2018, 08:48:05 PM by browneyedgirl98 »

carhamgrater
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Re: She
« Reply #6 on: May 20, 2018, 03:03:15 PM »
Great way to conclude part one. I like how he forced her to semi consent to him. Nice way humiliate forcing her to watch ad then later complimenting her when she did tell!. Looking forwards space reading more from you

One criticism- you could the paragraphs apart a little more e.g.
     Fuck. What was my plan? Do I go in there, or do I take her by surprise when she goes to leave, with the second option I’d risk her screaming, I don’t need that. I quietly turn the knob on the door and walk in. There she was, patting her chest in an attempt to clean her spill, my eyes glued to her as I approached. She turned to me and I stopped, she didn’t scream, she just gazed at me, tilting her head in confusion, she was so clueless.

 I felt like the big bad wolf, and she was little red riding hood. Her riding me, what a pretty picture, it was enough to send me over the edge, to really set me off. I closed my eyes and let out a long sigh, god how I wanted to take my time with her but this was going to have to be quick. I open my eyes and plant them on her still standing dazed beside the running sink, I didn’t know if I needed to move fast or slow to avoid a fight but time was ticking and I was running out of choices. My kindness leaves me as I charge her, grabbing her face and pinning her back to the nearest wall.

I leave the sink running, I’ll need that extra noise. Fuck the bill. Her eyes widen with many emotions, surprise, fear, betrayal, my hand is clamped tight over her mouth, I wasn’t about to fuck this up, I needed her quiet. Small whimpers escape beneath my hand and I shush her reassuringly. Tears well up in her eyes and she makes a grab for my hand weakly trying to pull it away from her face. She shakes her head and whimpers some more, pleading with her gaze. It only makes me want her more, poor girl, she’s really setting herself up for me. I remember from a previous conversation with Andrew that her neck is a “yes” area for her, a detail I hung onto, never thinking I’d have the chance to use it, this is it.

this makes it a little easier for the reader  than the larger semi wall of words that make it hard to follow at times. Never fear spacing a lot, some of us prefer to read longer rather than the literal brick, blank space mortar then brick format!

Offline browneyedgirl98

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Re: She
« Reply #7 on: May 20, 2018, 03:15:09 PM »
Great way to conclude part one. I like how he forced her to semi consent to him. Nice way humiliate forcing her to watch ad then later complimenting her when she did tell!. Looking forwards space reading more from you

One criticism- you could the paragraphs apart a little more e.g.
     Fuck. What was my plan? Do I go in there, or do I take her by surprise when she goes to leave, with the second option I’d risk her screaming, I don’t need that. I quietly turn the knob on the door and walk in. There she was, patting her chest in an attempt to clean her spill, my eyes glued to her as I approached. She turned to me and I stopped, she didn’t scream, she just gazed at me, tilting her head in confusion, she was so clueless.

 I felt like the big bad wolf, and she was little red riding hood. Her riding me, what a pretty picture, it was enough to send me over the edge, to really set me off. I closed my eyes and let out a long sigh, god how I wanted to take my time with her but this was going to have to be quick. I open my eyes and plant them on her still standing dazed beside the running sink, I didn’t know if I needed to move fast or slow to avoid a fight but time was ticking and I was running out of choices. My kindness leaves me as I charge her, grabbing her face and pinning her back to the nearest wall.

I leave the sink running, I’ll need that extra noise. Fuck the bill. Her eyes widen with many emotions, surprise, fear, betrayal, my hand is clamped tight over her mouth, I wasn’t about to fuck this up, I needed her quiet. Small whimpers escape beneath my hand and I shush her reassuringly. Tears well up in her eyes and she makes a grab for my hand weakly trying to pull it away from her face. She shakes her head and whimpers some more, pleading with her gaze. It only makes me want her more, poor girl, she’s really setting herself up for me. I remember from a previous conversation with Andrew that her neck is a “yes” area for her, a detail I hung onto, never thinking I’d have the chance to use it, this is it.

this makes it a little easier for the reader  than the larger semi wall of words that make it hard to follow at times. Never fear spacing a lot, some of us prefer to read longer rather than the literal brick, blank space mortar then brick format!

yes sir.

darklord
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Re: She
« Reply #8 on: May 20, 2018, 09:19:53 PM »
Great read! Love how the story builds up.  The elements are perfect too.  A party, a horny guy, a drunk girl.   Her initial resistance which slowly fades, are all good to the plot.  Great work!

Offline vile8r

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Re: She
« Reply #9 on: May 21, 2018, 05:33:55 AM »
Excellent job browneyedgirl! I love the whole premise and how you set it all up! You have quickly become one of my favorite new writers on RU.
I could rape your pussy, but I'd be in and out in a few minutes. So I choose to rape your mind, and I'll be inside you forever!

Offline browneyedgirl98

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Re: She
« Reply #10 on: May 21, 2018, 01:12:21 PM »
This encounter is short and sweet, something I’d like to share anyway.

Andrew invited us to his place one morning for a smoke session and some games, it was the weekend and we all have off, we often spend that free time hanging with each other so this happens quite often. After I while of being there, I head to their bathroom and immediately notice the other door is open, the entry to their room. Thats just how their apartment is set up, their bathroom doubles as a guest one. Andrew and Devin were in the living room, Janelle’s car was here, so where is the only other place she could be? I close the door I came through quietly, and walk over to the open one and slowly peer from behind the wall into the room, being careful not to be seen too much.

There she was, sleeping peacefully in their bed. Andrew must’ve left the door open as its an awful habit I hear Janelle grilling him for every now and again. I emerged more and took in the view, I caught that her shoulders were bare, looking more and more my eyes follow her body all the way down, and all she’s wearing? Lace panties, teal this time. I smirk. A love for lace huh? I think I may just have a love for it too…

I crept up closer to her, she was laying on her stomach with her ass peaking out from underneath the blanket, Andrew gets to sleep with her, her wearing practically nothing every single night. I admit I was jealous. But who does she really belong to now? I continue to run my eyes over her, and get the urge to just reach out and touch her, I move my hand from my side pinch the very top of the blanket and pull it back slowly, careful not to wake her, Im unsure if she’s a heavy or light sleeper, and this situation is very delicate. I fuck up, its all over. I move the cover steady, holding my breath. Janelle shifts and my blood runs cold, shit.

I let out a slow sigh of relief, she’s still asleep, and she’s put herself in a better position than she was the first time, she’s semi on her stomach and side, just exposing one breast to me. What a lovely event in my favor. I almost make the mistake and forgetting she’s asleep and full on grope her, I wanted to touch her so bad… I want to wake her but I think I’ve been gone way too long. I take out my phone and snap another picture, I think I may build a entire album of these. My unintentional collection. I go to leave and steal another glance at her panties, I wanted those too. Nine times out of ten I always have a blade on me, just because thats the kind of person I am. I slide the knife out of my pocket and slowly open it, trying to muffle the click, just in case. I carefully ran the blade underneath the fabric and angled it up, separating it with a simple flick of my hand, repeating the motion again to easily pull the lace from between her legs, this was going to be tricky. Id have to make her shift again without waking her up, but how?

The blanket. I flick the blanket with the tip of my knife, keeping it out just in case I have to do some convincing. I wait for her to move, nothing. Wash, rinse and repeat a little more, she shifts back onto her her stomach, great. Im not confident I’ll leave with a flawless victory, and think of an alternate way to get them. Should I just rip off the band aid and detain her possible protest if she wakes? I choose to take the risk and pull the the fabric in one swift motion and wait her to react.

Another shift, onto her back, and her eyes open. She spots me instantly and a small gasp escapes her. I raise the knife up to my lips in a shushing motion and stay that way while I pocket my prize. She sits up, her eyes not leaving me, she pulls the blanket over herself and whispers to me, manners still in order, “Please, get out.” I smirk and step closer, leaning over her, watching that fear grow, I no longer care about how long I’ve been gone. I put my lips in that familiar place by her ear and whisper back to her, “I find it really cute that you think you can tell me what to do, I thought I established already that I’m in charge, correct? Or, do I need to remind you, whore.”

I pull away from her, studying her face, she breaks eye contact to look at the sheets beneath her, she doesn’t say anything else. She’s not drunk, she’s well collected now and she’s a naturally feisty girl. Im surprised she’s even behaving for me so well, because the ball has been in her court this entire time, with safety right outside her door. I wonder why, but then again, I don’t care. Things are working in my favor, so Im not going to question it. “Thats better.” I catch her eye and smirk, I know Im an asshole. I head out of her room not looking back, already knowing her eyes are watching me leave. Till we meet again princess.
« Last Edit: June 04, 2018, 09:03:00 PM by browneyedgirl98 »

carhamgrater
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Re: She
« Reply #11 on: May 22, 2018, 06:08:43 AM »
Damn the only way that could have been better would be if he had groped her while fully aware to prove her submission to him!

Offline browneyedgirl98

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Re: She
« Reply #12 on: May 22, 2018, 09:07:13 PM »
Damn the only way that could have been better would be if he had groped her while fully aware to prove her submission to him!

drat! that would've been good, but this is kind of a series, with the character logging his different encounters, so maybe i can do something else down the line to make it better for you deeper into the "log"  ;)

carhamgrater
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Re: She
« Reply #13 on: May 23, 2018, 06:17:48 AM »
Don't worry about trying to please someone, write the 'log' you want to write. Others will always find something or someway that you might not have thought of. Remember the reader has the advantage what they are telling you is after reading what is already established making it so easy to add or subtract from!

Offline vile8r

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Re: She
« Reply #14 on: May 23, 2018, 06:58:44 AM »
Yeah browneyedgirl, he does that to me all the time, LOL!  But I appreciate it, because I file away all those little ideas and suggestions and then the next chapter or the next story, I can use them! It's nice to see other peoples' views on your work. Don't think of it as something you missed, look at it as something you can do in the next story.
I could rape your pussy, but I'd be in and out in a few minutes. So I choose to rape your mind, and I'll be inside you forever!