Author Topic: The Writing Questions Thread!  (Read 5635 times)

Offline KissyFace

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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #30 on: July 03, 2007, 04:00:07 PM »
Thank you, somedude. 
The Party


Following the party, I was very tired.   Several of my friends stayed and helped clean up, so I was in good shape there.   My feet were tired and I was ready to take my 3 inch heels off and soak in a hot tub.  Moving into the bedroom, I stand stretching in front of the mirror, watching how my blouse strains over my firm breasts.  I slowly unzip my skirt and wriggle it over my hips, exposing my black lace thong and black thigh highs.  Unbuttoning my blouse, I see that my nipples are hard and showing through the black lace.  My long light brown hair glows in the light and, although tired, my green eyes sparkle because of my party?s success.   My body has always pleased me and I delight in the way men watch me?at parties, at work and on the street.  I?ve never been shy about showing off, but men are not allowed to touch.  A few of my friends say I?m a tease, but I don?t believe that.  I am just saving myself for marriage and tell gentlemen friends that right away. 
Going into the bathroom, I start to run the water and add the special body oil for relaxation.  Turning my CD player on, the music is soothing and I start to move in time with the beat.  I light several candles and turn off the lights.   Putting my foot on the edge of the tub, I start to roll down the thigh high when something catches my eye.  Startled, I look up into the eyes of a tall man dressed in black wearing a mask over his face.  ?Turn the water off, sweetie.?   I turn the water off and face you slowly.  ?What are you doing here??   Your soft voice answered, ?I heard there was a party.?   ?Well, the party?s over now.  Please leave?, I say.  ?Oh, I think our party?s just starting, sweetie,? I heard you say.  You?re standing in the doorway, so I can?t get out.  I look around, trying to find something I can use for a weapon, and find none.
?Come here, dear,? you whisper.  I look into your brilliant blue eyes and don?t see any mercy or indecision.  ?Please go away?..I?ll scream if you don?t go away,? I murmur, ?Please go.  I won?t tell anyone you were here.?  I hear you laugh as you motion me to you.  My shoulders sag as I walk toward you, trying to think of a way out of this.  As I get to the door you slowly move and take my arm to lead me into the bedroom.  As we enter the bedroom, you pull my hands behind my back and tie them.   The door to the hall is closed and locked.  You lead me to the bed and sit me down, watching my cleavage, while you lick your lips.  Taking a large knife from your back pocket, you trace the blade down my cheek and throat to my breasts, letting me feel the blade, but not cutting me.   Placing the tip of the blade under the left strap, you slice through it and then slice through the other strap.  Unhooking the single front hook, the bra falls away and my breasts spring free.  Looking down I see the nipples are hard and I watch your hands fondle and twist them. 
?Please don?t,? I beg, ?I won?t tell.   Just go away and leave me alone.?  A sharp slap across my face is my answer, as you growl, ?Shut up.  I don?t want to hear you.?   Grabbing my left leg, you tie it to the footboard.  I try to kick and keep my right leg away from you, but it soon follows the left.  You untie my hands, but quickly re-tie them to the headboard.  Laying there spread-eagled, wearing only panties, thigh highs and heels,  I can only imagine what is next.  I hear you, but can?t see you, until you come into view with a blindfold in your hand.   ?No, please, don?t blindfold me,? I cry as I thrash my head around trying to stop you from putting the blindfold on me.  Feeling your hands on my head, all of a sudden, I can?t see.   I scream until your hand goes over my mouth and you whisper in my ear, ?Stop screaming?you won?t get hurt if you do what I say.?   Shaking, I stop screaming and you remove your hand from my mouth.   I feel your hands on my breasts, kneading, rubbing and twisting.  Your hands move down my body, and I feel the knife blade slide under the waistband of my thong and feel the material give way.  The mattress shifts as you get on the bed and I can tell you are between my legs.  Your mouth startles me, as you kiss my shaven mound and your hands start to open my pussy lips.  I scream as I feel your tongue on my clit and, at the same time, feel your finger enter my pussy.  I feel you move and find my mouth full of material and realize that you have put my panties in my mouth for a gag.  Your fingers find my pussy again, while your tongue dances on my clit.   One, then two fingers enter my pussy, while you lick and suck my clit.  Stretching me gently, you add another finger and start to slowly fuck me.  I can feel the juices flowing and you entering me deeper and faster.  I feel so full and realize you have four fingers in me now.  I hear you mutter, as the bed shifts again, and hear a zipper unzip.  You kneel between my legs, bend over and whisper, ?I want to fuck you before I fist you honey?you?re so tight?don?t want to ruin that feel with a fisting.?  I start squirming to keep you out of me, but you take hold of my waist and hold me still, thrusting fully into me, slapping your balls on my ass.  I scream through my gag, as my virginity is taken. 
?Oh, that was nice, sweetie,? I hear you say, ?I haven?t had a virgin in a long time.?  You start fucking me faster and deeper, while you alternately suck and lick my breasts. You?re fucking me harder with each stroke and my body starts to shake with the force of your thrusts.  I hear you moan a little, as you speed up again.  I?m so sore and start to cry as you slam into my poor pussy.   With a loud shout, I feel you shake and your cum spurts into my pussy, coating the walls.  You collapse on my body, and I feel the fluids run down the crack in my ass.  Your breathing slows along with your heartbeat, as I realize you are naked. 
Feeling your lips on my cheek, I hear you say, ?Are you ready for round two, sweetie??  I can?t imagine what round two is and shake my head at you.  ?You?ll like it, sweetie.  I promise.?  I feel you between my legs again and suddenly feel your fingers in my pussy.  My pussy feels so full, you must have four fingers in me.  ?You?re going to love this, honey,? you say, ?Wait until my whole hand is in there.?  Your thumb slides in with your fingers and I can feel the rest of your hand slip into me, fingers spreading me.  I feel your hand close into a fist, and start to fuck me with your fist.  It hurts and I start to squirm and move around and try to get you out of me, but I can?t.  You keep fucking me and the pain is so bad, my mind blurs and I loose consciousness. 
When I wake up, I can?t hear you or feel you.  ?So you?re awake again, sweetie,? I hear you say.  ?It?s a good thing?.time for round three.?  I hear you walk to the bed and sit down and stroke my thighs just above my stockings.  ?Round three is very special, sweetie, you?ll like it.  I don?t often have two virgin holes to play with.?  Hearing that fills me with terror and I think I know what is coming.  I start screaming through my gag, and pulling on my restraints, but it does no good.  I hear you laughing as you say, ?It?s okay, sweetie, scream all you want.  No one can hear you and you can?t get away.  Just relax and enjoy this.?  Your hand goes between my legs and I feel your fingers playing on my ass hole.  I squirm and wriggle and try to keep you away, but I can?t.  Screaming as your finger sinks into my hole, I feel you wiggling and stretching me.  You stick the second finger in me and the pain is so intense, I scream again through my gag.  Stretching and wiggling your fingers, I feel the third slide in me.  ?ARGHHHHHHHH.?   It hurts so much.  Your hand slaps my ass hard as you insert the fourth finger in me and wiggle them around, stretching me wider.  ?That?s not bad, sweetie.  You should be ready for me.?  I feel you move on the bed until you?re again between my legs.  Placing your hands under my ass, you raise me a little and I feel the tip of your hard cock at the entrance to my hole.  Slowly, but steadily, you enter me.  It burns and I scream again and again, but you keep entering me until you?re fully lodged to the hilt.  You stop moving and just stay still for some time.  Then I feel you withdraw, only to thrust back in me harder and deeper.  You begin to fuck me hard and deep, while I scream and moan into my gag, trying to dislodge it.  If I could just plead with you?.you can?t know how bad it hurts me.  I hear you laughing and can?t believe it.  I struggle to get my hands and legs free, but you hold my body steady, while pounding mercilessly.  I am so angry and terrified.  Will you leave when you are done with this horrible rape?  No family to check on me?.not due to work for 3 days?..no close neighbors.  If I get out of this, I?ll have an alarm.  I hear you groan as you shoot your hot cum in my ass, coating me.  I can feel the cum drip down my crease. 
I feel you move on the bed and again you sit beside me.  You get up and go into the bathroom?I can hear you moving around.  You sit back down and I can smell something, but don?t know what it is until I feel the pain on my nipples.  I scream and jump and try to wriggle away, but the wax touches my nipples and I hear you laugh and say, ?It will be better if you don?t move, honey.  It will hurt less.?  You drip the wax down my belly to my mound and onto my pussy lips and then onto my clit.  I?m screaming and writhing, but you don?t stop and the pain is bad.  I start chanting to myself?go away, go away, go away, go away.   You laugh as you get up again and I hear your zipper zip.  Oh, my god, you?re really leaving.  I want to laugh myself, but can?t.  All of a sudden you take my panties from my mouth and I take a deep breath.  I remain quiet, hoping I?ll hear you leaving.  ?I just think I?ll take these with me, darling,? you say, as you remove the blindfold and I see you put my panties in your pocket.   ?Please, untie me.  Don?t leave me like this,? I plead.  You look at me and smile and I don?t have a clue what you will do.  You lean over and kiss my cheek, while you untie my right arm.  Then you turn and leave.  As you go out the door, I hear you say, ?It was a good party, sweetie.  Glad I could come.?

Cole32
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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #31 on: July 03, 2007, 07:01:52 PM »
My question concerns Dialogue?

I constantly find myself writing what I want my characters to say followed by -- He Said Or She said at the end of each dialogue sequence, Is there a way around having to point out how said what or should I just take it for granted that the reader will know who said it ? ..

Offline somedude

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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #32 on: July 04, 2007, 03:36:45 AM »
That's a really good question Cole32! All writers can fall into just using said over and over again! Of course if you don't use some phrase to denote who said what your dialogue turns into a confusing mess no one can follow.  So what I do is be creative with my dialogue, use different phrases and meld the dialoge and the action parts of the sentence so that they flow.  Example:

"What do you want?" Angel demanded in her soft feminine voice. "Why am I here?"
Subgirl pinched the new slave's pink nipples sharply and as the girl gasped she told her, "To make you my slave honey!"
"Tina?!" the redhead gasped in shock as she obviously recognized her friend's voice.
Subgirl giggled and tweaked her victim's hardening nipples more. "The one and only. But here I am the Rape Mistress and from now on you will call me Mistress," she said.
Angel squirmed from the way her new mistress was tormenting her nipples and asked, "Why are you doing this to me?"
"Because I want to make you my bitch sweetie," the Rape Mistress replied and rolled and polled the other girl's tits so that she squealed. "I've wanted to make you scream and beg as my little slave girl since I first laid as on ya," she declared.
"But I'm your friend," Angel whimpered.
"You're my slave," Subgirl corrected and releasing her slave's nipples she slapped her face with one hand, then the other while telling her, "And you will always address me as mistress!"
Angel began to cry then, with tears flowing out from under her blindfold. "Please just let me go Tina," she begged.
"Now I must punish you for not callin me mistress," Subgirl said with a theatrical sigh because she very much wanted to punish her beautiful new plaything.

That's what I like to do, but every write develop their own style eventually!
UUUUUGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!

Cole32
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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #33 on: July 04, 2007, 01:37:34 PM »
Thanks somedude, Will take it under consideration.

Offline sindyloo

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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #34 on: July 06, 2007, 12:56:11 PM »
   Okay Somedude.....whats is the best point of view to use in any story to make it interesting??  The person the story is about or the other say watcher in the same story!!

   Sorry..hope you know what I mean?? :-\
Whips and Chains are SUCH......FUN!!!

Offline somedude

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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #35 on: July 07, 2007, 03:47:30 AM »
Thank you, somedude. 
The Party


Following the party, I was very tired.   Several of my friends stayed and helped clean up, so I was in good shape there.   My feet were tired and I was ready to take my 3 inch heels off and soak in a hot tub.  Moving into the bedroom, I stand stretching in front of the mirror, watching how my blouse strains over my firm breasts.  I slowly unzip my skirt and wriggle it over my hips, exposing my black lace thong and black thigh highs.  Unbuttoning my blouse, I see that my nipples are hard and showing through the black lace.  My long light brown hair glows in the light and, although tired, my green eyes sparkle because of my party?s success.   My body has always pleased me and I delight in the way men watch me?at parties, at work and on the street.  I?ve never been shy about showing off, but men are not allowed to touch.  A few of my friends say I?m a tease, but I don?t believe that.  I am just saving myself for marriage and tell gentlemen friends that right away. 
Going into the bathroom, I start to run the water and add the special body oil for relaxation.  Turning my CD player on, the music is soothing and I start to move in time with the beat.  I light several candles and turn off the lights.   Putting my foot on the edge of the tub, I start to roll down the thigh high when something catches my eye.  Startled, I look up into the eyes of a tall man dressed in black wearing a mask over his face.  ?Turn the water off, sweetie.?   I turn the water off and face you slowly.  ?What are you doing here??   Your soft voice answered, ?I heard there was a party.?   ?Well, the party?s over now.  Please leave?, I say.  ?Oh, I think our party?s just starting, sweetie,? I heard you say.  You?re standing in the doorway, so I can?t get out.  I look around, trying to find something I can use for a weapon, and find none.
?Come here, dear,? you whisper.  I look into your brilliant blue eyes and don?t see any mercy or indecision.  ?Please go away?..I?ll scream if you don?t go away,? I murmur, ?Please go.  I won?t tell anyone you were here.?  I hear you laugh as you motion me to you.  My shoulders sag as I walk toward you, trying to think of a way out of this.  As I get to the door you slowly move and take my arm to lead me into the bedroom.  As we enter the bedroom, you pull my hands behind my back and tie them.   The door to the hall is closed and locked.  You lead me to the bed and sit me down, watching my cleavage, while you lick your lips.  Taking a large knife from your back pocket, you trace the blade down my cheek and throat to my breasts, letting me feel the blade, but not cutting me.   Placing the tip of the blade under the left strap, you slice through it and then slice through the other strap.  Unhooking the single front hook, the bra falls away and my breasts spring free.  Looking down I see the nipples are hard and I watch your hands fondle and twist them. 
?Please don?t,? I beg, ?I won?t tell.   Just go away and leave me alone.?  A sharp slap across my face is my answer, as you growl, ?Shut up.  I don?t want to hear you.?   Grabbing my left leg, you tie it to the footboard.  I try to kick and keep my right leg away from you, but it soon follows the left.  You untie my hands, but quickly re-tie them to the headboard.  Laying there spread-eagled, wearing only panties, thigh highs and heels,  I can only imagine what is next.  I hear you, but can?t see you, until you come into view with a blindfold in your hand.   ?No, please, don?t blindfold me,? I cry as I thrash my head around trying to stop you from putting the blindfold on me.  Feeling your hands on my head, all of a sudden, I can?t see.   I scream until your hand goes over my mouth and you whisper in my ear, ?Stop screaming?you won?t get hurt if you do what I say.?   Shaking, I stop screaming and you remove your hand from my mouth.   I feel your hands on my breasts, kneading, rubbing and twisting.  Your hands move down my body, and I feel the knife blade slide under the waistband of my thong and feel the material give way.  The mattress shifts as you get on the bed and I can tell you are between my legs.  Your mouth startles me, as you kiss my shaven mound and your hands start to open my pussy lips.  I scream as I feel your tongue on my clit and, at the same time, feel your finger enter my pussy.  I feel you move and find my mouth full of material and realize that you have put my panties in my mouth for a gag.  Your fingers find my pussy again, while your tongue dances on my clit.   One, then two fingers enter my pussy, while you lick and suck my clit.  Stretching me gently, you add another finger and start to slowly fuck me.  I can feel the juices flowing and you entering me deeper and faster.  I feel so full and realize you have four fingers in me now.  I hear you mutter, as the bed shifts again, and hear a zipper unzip.  You kneel between my legs, bend over and whisper, ?I want to fuck you before I fist you honey?you?re so tight?don?t want to ruin that feel with a fisting.?  I start squirming to keep you out of me, but you take hold of my waist and hold me still, thrusting fully into me, slapping your balls on my ass.  I scream through my gag, as my virginity is taken. 
?Oh, that was nice, sweetie,? I hear you say, ?I haven?t had a virgin in a long time.?  You start fucking me faster and deeper, while you alternately suck and lick my breasts. You?re fucking me harder with each stroke and my body starts to shake with the force of your thrusts.  I hear you moan a little, as you speed up again.  I?m so sore and start to cry as you slam into my poor pussy.   With a loud shout, I feel you shake and your cum spurts into my pussy, coating the walls.  You collapse on my body, and I feel the fluids run down the crack in my ass.  Your breathing slows along with your heartbeat, as I realize you are naked. 
Feeling your lips on my cheek, I hear you say, ?Are you ready for round two, sweetie??  I can?t imagine what round two is and shake my head at you.  ?You?ll like it, sweetie.  I promise.?  I feel you between my legs again and suddenly feel your fingers in my pussy.  My pussy feels so full, you must have four fingers in me.  ?You?re going to love this, honey,? you say, ?Wait until my whole hand is in there.?  Your thumb slides in with your fingers and I can feel the rest of your hand slip into me, fingers spreading me.  I feel your hand close into a fist, and start to fuck me with your fist.  It hurts and I start to squirm and move around and try to get you out of me, but I can?t.  You keep fucking me and the pain is so bad, my mind blurs and I loose consciousness. 
When I wake up, I can?t hear you or feel you.  ?So you?re awake again, sweetie,? I hear you say.  ?It?s a good thing?.time for round three.?  I hear you walk to the bed and sit down and stroke my thighs just above my stockings.  ?Round three is very special, sweetie, you?ll like it.  I don?t often have two virgin holes to play with.?  Hearing that fills me with terror and I think I know what is coming.  I start screaming through my gag, and pulling on my restraints, but it does no good.  I hear you laughing as you say, ?It?s okay, sweetie, scream all you want.  No one can hear you and you can?t get away.  Just relax and enjoy this.?  Your hand goes between my legs and I feel your fingers playing on my ass hole.  I squirm and wriggle and try to keep you away, but I can?t.  Screaming as your finger sinks into my hole, I feel you wiggling and stretching me.  You stick the second finger in me and the pain is so intense, I scream again through my gag.  Stretching and wiggling your fingers, I feel the third slide in me.  ?ARGHHHHHHHH.?   It hurts so much.  Your hand slaps my ass hard as you insert the fourth finger in me and wiggle them around, stretching me wider.  ?That?s not bad, sweetie.  You should be ready for me.?  I feel you move on the bed until you?re again between my legs.  Placing your hands under my ass, you raise me a little and I feel the tip of your hard cock at the entrance to my hole.  Slowly, but steadily, you enter me.  It burns and I scream again and again, but you keep entering me until you?re fully lodged to the hilt.  You stop moving and just stay still for some time.  Then I feel you withdraw, only to thrust back in me harder and deeper.  You begin to fuck me hard and deep, while I scream and moan into my gag, trying to dislodge it.  If I could just plead with you?.you can?t know how bad it hurts me.  I hear you laughing and can?t believe it.  I struggle to get my hands and legs free, but you hold my body steady, while pounding mercilessly.  I am so angry and terrified.  Will you leave when you are done with this horrible rape?  No family to check on me?.not due to work for 3 days?..no close neighbors.  If I get out of this, I?ll have an alarm.  I hear you groan as you shoot your hot cum in my ass, coating me.  I can feel the cum drip down my crease. 
I feel you move on the bed and again you sit beside me.  You get up and go into the bathroom?I can hear you moving around.  You sit back down and I can smell something, but don?t know what it is until I feel the pain on my nipples.  I scream and jump and try to wriggle away, but the wax touches my nipples and I hear you laugh and say, ?It will be better if you don?t move, honey.  It will hurt less.?  You drip the wax down my belly to my mound and onto my pussy lips and then onto my clit.  I?m screaming and writhing, but you don?t stop and the pain is bad.  I start chanting to myself?go away, go away, go away, go away.   You laugh as you get up again and I hear your zipper zip.  Oh, my god, you?re really leaving.  I want to laugh myself, but can?t.  All of a sudden you take my panties from my mouth and I take a deep breath.  I remain quiet, hoping I?ll hear you leaving.  ?I just think I?ll take these with me, darling,? you say, as you remove the blindfold and I see you put my panties in your pocket.   ?Please, untie me.  Don?t leave me like this,? I plead.  You look at me and smile and I don?t have a clue what you will do.  You lean over and kiss my cheek, while you untie my right arm.  Then you turn and leave.  As you go out the door, I hear you say, ?It was a good party, sweetie.  Glad I could come.?

You've got a pretty good story here kissyface!  But you need to work on your punctuation, capitalization and paragraph structure.  You have a lot of question marks that don't need to be there too! You need to do some editing and rewriting:)
UUUUUGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!

Ladynnh
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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #36 on: July 07, 2007, 10:12:45 AM »
  Nice story..enjoyed it!! ::):

Offline somedude

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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #37 on: July 07, 2007, 01:44:46 PM »
   Okay Somedude.....whats is the best point of view to use in any story to make it interesting??  The person the story is about or the other say watcher in the same story!!

   Sorry..hope you know what I mean?? :-\
You mean first or third person!  First person is good for a certain depth of character...you know what the character is feeling and thinking in their own words.  Third person is more narrative in style and allows for more flexibility in the story, such as switching between characters point of view with each scene and the like.  Personally I prefer third person, though I will write in first if the story calls for it!
« Last Edit: July 07, 2007, 03:51:43 PM by somedude »
UUUUUGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!

Offline KissyFace

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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #38 on: July 07, 2007, 06:07:34 PM »

You've got a pretty good story here kissyface!  But you need to work on your punctuation, capitalization and paragraph structure.  You have a lot of question marks that don't need to be there too! You need to do some editing and rewriting:)

Thanks, SD

But I didn't put the question marks there.   Don't know how they got there.  But I could send you the original and the question marks are not there.

I appreciate the comments.

KF

Cole32
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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #39 on: July 07, 2007, 06:18:04 PM »

You've got a pretty good story here kissyface!  But you need to work on your punctuation, capitalization and paragraph structure.  You have a lot of question marks that don't need to be there too! You need to do some editing and rewriting:)

Thanks, SD

But I didn't put the question marks there.   Don't know how they got there.  But I could send you the original and the question marks are not there.

I appreciate the comments.

KF


The Question marks aprear if you copy and paste it from word.

it replaces all the " and ' with ?

hope that helps...

Offline KissyFace

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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #40 on: July 07, 2007, 06:22:12 PM »
Thank you, Cole.    I HATE  Word.

Cole32
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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #41 on: July 07, 2007, 06:26:32 PM »
your welcome kissy gald i could help.

Offline somedude

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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #42 on: July 08, 2007, 01:05:06 PM »

You've got a pretty good story here kissyface!  But you need to work on your punctuation, capitalization and paragraph structure.  You have a lot of question marks that don't need to be there too! You need to do some editing and rewriting:)

Thanks, SD

But I didn't put the question marks there.   Don't know how they got there.  But I could send you the original and the question marks are not there.

I appreciate the comments.

KF
You're welcome kissyface! I hope they helped ::):
UUUUUGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!

Offline sindyloo

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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #43 on: July 13, 2007, 12:55:59 PM »
  Cool third person huh??   Thanks very helpful Somedude!! :emot_kiss.gif:
Whips and Chains are SUCH......FUN!!!

Offline somedude

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Re: The Writing Questions Thread!
« Reply #44 on: July 13, 2007, 08:20:44 PM »
You're welcome Sindy!
UUUUUGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!