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Author Topic: Darkheart's list of USA munches  (Read 11314 times)
Masters Degree

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only a Dean for tech help

« on: April 13, 2008, 03:06:52 PM »

UPDATE FOR OUR UK FRIENDS: here's the best source for UK munches I've found:


And since Darkheart's master list isn't maintained as much and may disappear, here 'tis:


edit: Darkheart is gone, here's the last archived copy:

National: General Resources

  • Acme BDSM: no, not what Wile E Coyote did with the Roadrunner!  This is a web resource and discussion page for the BDSM community.
  • The BDSM Events Page: lists time-sensitive information on events and a few international listings--very good resource
  • BDSM Partner Registry: An idea long overdue--an online gift registry for those of us in the lifestyle!
  • Black Beat Inc: an
    independent, non-profit, social organization founded by African
    American members of the D/s, BDSM and Leather community nationwide.
    Black BEAT strives to cultivate safe, sane, consenting adults (21 years
    and older) with alternative lifestyle and sexuality interests via
    culture, education, development, support, and event planning.
  • Bound: branches in
    Washington, DC as well as Baltimore MD, Tampa, FL, Richmond, VA, New
    Haven, CT. (NYC, Chicago, Philadelphia, San Francisco and Seattle by
    Oct 1998). *European* branches: Reykjavik, Iceland, Stockholm Sweden,
    and Prague CZ.
  • BDSM Events: mailing lists of local BDSM events, also has international listings
  • BDSM Travelers:
    BDSM Travelers is a directory of friendly, travel-loving people in the
    BDSM lifestyle who offer each other the gift of hospitality in their
    homes. Members from around the world offer their hospitality to other
    members at no charge. These hosts, in turn, are received when they
  • BDSM Village: an online cyber 'village' & resource center, but supports RL events and workshops as well in various locations.
  • The Beacon E-Zine:
    Online bi-monthly newsletter and calendar of BDSM events for the SE US.
    Covers Alabama, Arkansas, Georgia, Florida, Louisiana, Mississippi,
    North Carolina, South Carolina and Tennessee.
  • Chamber Door; good article/educational resource
    Dom sub Lifestyle: online bi-monthly newsletter and international calendar of BDSM events, groups, and group listings.
  • The Fetish Alliance: education & support resource
  • Immediate Family: an Alternative Lifestyle Safehouse/Rescue project with affiliate houses throughout the US, Canada and the UK.
  • International Deaf Leather; P.O. Box 30286, Columbus OH 43230.
  • The Fireside Society: network for women and couples into BDSM in NC, SC, VA, and GA
  • Kink Aware Professionals
  • The Kinky Lawyer: legal resource page, as it applies to us kinky folk.
  • Kinky Tax:  A kink friendly tax lawyer to help with the non-consential sadism practiced by the IRS.
  • National Leather Association
  • International Association of Rubberists
  • The Kinky Links Directory:
    I don't list 'professional' Dominants or Dungeons on this page, but
    this guide is an excellent resource to that part of the scene.
  • Lifestyle Choices Legal Resources Center:
    an organization to assist those who live an alternative BDSM lifestyle,
    whose lifestyle is being made an issue in a court of Law, on the job or
    at home.
  • Romantic Hotels:
    a directory of Romantic, Adult and Theme Room Hotels in the US and
    Canada for romantic getaway spots. Decent resource for kinky folks
    travelling, or for those who arent into the dungeon/play party scene
    but still want to do something a little different for a scene.
  • SM Sex--Safely: the STOP
    AIDS Project.  Targets gay and bisexual men, but this BDSM resource has material
    that is appropriate for anyone involved in BDSM/kink practices.
  • Sweet Surrender: online adult BDSM education site
  • Submissive Women Speak: Reality-based information and advice for submissive women and the people who love them.
  • Aggressive AIDS Prevention:
    nonprofit corporation dedicated to raising awareness of HIV/AIDS,
    encouraging HIV antibody testing, and promoting HIV Negative
    maintenance through Media.
  • DS Kiosk Power Exchange Resource Center


  • AlabamaFemDom-Malesub; play parties, social gatherings, and demonstrations.
  • Bound for Pleasure; North Alabama PanSexual Group devoted to the education and support of the BDSM Lifestyle.
  • Birmingham: Birmingham Leather/Fetish Society; A Pansexual lifestyle group promoting Leather solidarity and activism in Central Alabama and around the region.
  • The Red Chair; adult pan-sexual BDSM education, discussion and social group. Email rdchair@aol.comfor info.
  • Huntville: NASSA; North Alabama Spanking and Social Alternatives, pansexual support, education, & munch group.
  • Alabama Daddies/Girls Club(1ADGC);
    Group dedicated to educating and learning everything that can be shared
    between consenting adults concerning the Daddy/littlegirl concept.
  • Binding Ties; personal ad/discussion group, also holds RL munches in the Huntsville, Decatur, & Madison areas.
  • NAPEX; North Alabama Power Exchange
  • Montgomery: Central Alabama Power Exchange;
    pansexual, alternative lifestyle group with particular interests in B D
    S M and D/s and dedicated to Safe, Sane and Consensual aspects of the
  • Pelham: Steel City Centurions; men's group, email for info.
  • Sylacauga: DARE; social group
  • Tuscaloosa: TuscaloosaALG; Alternative Lifestyles Group located in the Tuscaloosa area.   Mainly a BDSM & D/s group, but all are welcome.  





  • Calendar of BDSM California Events
  • Southern California Munch Group
  • The Gathering: Southern California socials
  • SOCalMunch;
    SoCalMUNCH covers the following areas: Palm Desert, Rancho Mirage, La
    Quinta, Indio, Coachella, Thermal, & the Westshores of the Salton
  • Northern California BDSM: social organization for individuals seeking a supportive environment for exploring alternative sexuality.
  • Bakersfield: Bakersfield BDSM Group Munch
  • Berkeley: Womanlink International; women's group, 2124 Kittredge #257, Berkeley CA 94704.
  • Central California: Chosen Lifestyle
  • Canoga Park:  MP Bands; P.O. Box 2843, Canoga Park, CA 91306
  • Chico: Chico BDSM Munch
  • El Cerrito: La Madrona; femdom couple's group, P.O. Box 1335, El Cerrito CA 94530.
  • Fairfield: Munch, first Sunday of each month, email for info.
  • Los Angeles: Avatar Club
  • C.C.Inc; BDSM socials, run by the same people behind Conquest and Fetish X.  Also weekly BDSM membership only parties at Lair de Sade
  • Dualities; discussion and munch group for switches
  • Eagle LA; Formerly The
    Gauntlet II, the Eagle L.A. is Los Angeles' hottest Levi/Leather bar.
    Always upholding the Leather/Uniform/Fetish ethic, with the hottest
    leathermen in town.
  • MAsT L.A; A support and discussion group for gay men interested in the Master/slave or Dominant/submissive relationship.  
  • Lair de Sade; A
    private membership organization established for the pleasure and
    recreation of BDSM lifestylers. Over 6,700 square feet. multiple
    buildings, kitchen, 3 bathrooms and basement. 30+ playstations with
    exquisite BDSM furniture and equipment. Outside patio for socializing
    and smoking features cast iron patio heaters and a firepit.
  • LA Pups; social group
    for all human pups/dogs, Handlers/Trainers/Owners of human pups, or
    anyone that has an interest in human pups. The group is open to all
    genders and orientations.
  • Los Angeles boys of leather;
    a group of submissives who are in service to the local leather
    community. The term "leatherboy" can refer to people of any age,
    gender, appearance or sexual orientation who share a common dedication
    to service and devotion to the leather community.
  • Los Angeles Girls of Leather;
    LAgoL is a group focused on providing a welcoming space for
    leathergirls and to provide service to our local Leather/BDSM
    community. Leather girls are men and women who find joy in being of
    service to others. We are slaves, submissives, and bottoms with a
    feminine heart and include service people of all genders and sexual
  • LA Leather Coalition; A
    pansexual coalition of leather and fetish identified businesses and
    motorcycle, educational, social and uniform organizations. The LALC
    facilitates communication and mutual understanding among different
    segments of the leather/fetish-affiliated community, and promotes unity
    through cooperative endeavors that offer entertainment, education,
    social interaction, and community service.
  • Los Angeles Radical and Wicked Women;
    A women's group devoted to the educational and social well-being of the
    women's BDSM, leather, and fetish communities. LARAWW welcomes all
    women and transfolk, regardless of their sexual orientation or
    preference. We provide high quality educational programs and
    information, play parties and social gatherings.
  • NLA-Los Angeles; 7985 Santa Monica Blvd 109-217, West Hollywood CA 90046
  • PLAY;
    A social and educational group for leatherfolk interested in the
    integration of radical sexuality and spirituality; provides spiritual
    outreach to the leather/fetish community; fosters leather/fetish
    understanding within the larger spiritual community. PLAY is open to
    all adults without regard to gender, age, race, religious/spiritual
    affiliation or sexual orientation.
  • Trident International; 1064 Myra Avenue, #32, Los Angeles, CA 90026
  • The Threshold Society; non-profit social & educational organization
  • Lower Lake: Alternative Lake County CA; online magazine.  Also holds BDSM classes and workshops.  Contact: jwolf@usa.com
  • Marina Del Rey: Threshold; 2554 Lincoln Blvd PMB 1004, Marina Del Rey CA 90291 Phone: (818) 782-1160
  • Lake County Munch
  • Lompoc: Lompoc Valley Power Exchange; pansexual munch group, email LVPX-owner@yahoogroups.com for info.
  • Marysville: Marysville Yubacity Munch group. Email: Sierraflowr@comcast.net
  • Milpitas:  MilPitas PlAyers
  • Modesto: The Modesto Discussion Group
  • Monterey: Monterey Bay Kinksters; munches in Monterey & Moss Landing.
  • Stile di vita;
    Stile di vita (Italian for 'lifestyle') Supports the Male
    Dominant/female submissive community in California's South Bay
    providing an intellectual approach to D/s and M/s lifestyles.
  • North Bay: Munch, third Sunday of each month, email for info.
  • Orange County: Under Ground Leather Association; private membership association, but holds discussion meetings open to the general public
  • Orange County Munch Group: Pansexual BDSM Group
  • Palo Alto/Sunnyvale: The Munch
  • Petaluma: North Bay Third Sunday Munch
  • Redding: munch group for northern CA, meets
    the last Friday of each month. Email MDW@charter.net for details.
  • Riverside: Paddlers of Southern California;
    PSC is a discussion list & munch group for adults in the Southern
    California area who are involved in the BDSM Lifestyle, and for those
    who would like to meet others in the BDSM Lifestyle, to share,
    socialize and interact in a safe, friendly and harmonious atmosphere
    and environment.
  • Sacramento: EroticEdge: BDSM discussion group, especially for newcomers.
  • FemDommes of Sacramento; open to all submissives and Femdommes
  • Sacramento Valley Leathercorps; gay men's and women's group
  • "T"ransitions
  • San Bernardino: Phoenix Alternative; pansexual BDSM education and social organization.
  • San Diego: Club X; P. O. Box 3092,
    San Diego, CA 92163  Phone: (619) 685-5149  Email: info@clubxsd.org
  • San Diego Social; meets and greets once a month.
  • San Fernando Valley Munch
  • San Francisco:  Cogent Warriors; women's group, 2261 Market #250, San Francisco, CA 94114
  • Constantines of the Bay Area; men's group
  • Defenders San Francisco; Catholic leather society
  • El Cerrito Munch; 3rd monday's, 7 pm at Carrow's Restaurant, 6120 Potrero at San Pablo Ave
  • The Exiles; P.O. Box 31266, San Francisco CA 94131  Phone: (415)487-5170
  • Fifteen Association; men's group, P.O. Box 421302, San Francisco, CA 94142
  • The Forum of San Francisco; coalition of motorcycle and leather clubs
  • Leathermen's Discussion Group: located at EROS, 2051 Market St., near Church St., San Francisco
  • Links; 207 Gough Street, #58, San Francisco, CA 94102  Phone: (415) 695-7955 or (415) 703-7159
  • Mahogany Pleasures of Darkness; BDSM online discussion / munch group for People of Color and the people who like them
  • ; classes, discussion groups, and dungeon parties.
  • ; Lists upcoming
    events for the mens community along with other information, including
    an overview of the neighborhood for visitors.
  • San Francisco Girls of Leather;
    SFgoL provides a source of communication, information, growth and
    support for Leather girls; educates the community about leathergirls;
    supports activities within the leather community. Leathergirls are
    people with a girl's heart, whose primary self-identity is girl. The
    girl identity is not limited by bio sex, gender, or sexual orientation.
  • Service of Mankind Church; P.O. Box 1335, El Cerrito, CA 94530  Phone: (510) 232-1369
  • The Stampede; The Bay Area Human Animal Roleplay Society
  • Power Exchange Sex Clubs
  • San Francisco Leather Online; listing of leather clubs and events
  • Society of Janus; P.O. Box 411523, San Francisco, CA 94141   Email: janus@soj.org
  • San Jose: Santa Clara County Leather Association, email mssccla2000@leatherspace.com
  • Edges; play space, also hosts play parties
  • Leather WISDOM; women's group, P.O. Box 2519, Santa Clara CA 95055.
  • SM Odyssey; Pansexual
    organization that holds educational classes every month, Includes the
    San Jose Munch, mens/women/pansexual discussion groups and Play
  • Southern Cross
  • Santa Clarita: Santa Clarita Munch
  • Santa Cruz: Santa Crux Munch
  • Studio City: Shadow Lane
  • Vallejo: The Overlook; offers
    a monthly event as well as provides event listings in the Northern California area.









  • Central Illinois: Leatherpalooza; BDSM education and events.
  • Chicago:  Chicago Leather Club;
    pansexual organization that provides a supportive, social, and
    educational environment for the Levi/leather, BDSM, and fetish
  • Chicago Far North Shore Munch Group
  • Chicago Hellfire Club; men's group, P.O. Box 5426, Chicago, IL 60680  
  • Crimson Moon Ltd: spanking resource & party site
  • Dedicated and Safe: membership pansexual group, hosts seminars, parties
  • Galleria Domain; BDSM membership club
  • Leather Archives;
    "Our Mission: The compilation, preservation and maintenance of leather
    lifestyle and related lifestyles [including but not limited to the Gay
    and Lesbian communities], history, archives and memorabilia for
    historical, educational and research purposes."
  • Leather United-Chicago; P.O. Box 81288, Chicago, IL 60681-1288  Phone: 773-486-5499  Email: LeatherUN@aol.com
  • Leather SINS Social Club;
    Leather SINS is Leather Social Interaction of the North Shore, a
    Chicago area Dinner Group which meets twice monthly as well as
    presenting other functions throughout the year.
  • BDSM Chicago;  Features CRAM (Chicago rope and mummification group) and CHISM (Chicago BDSM community calendar).
  • LRA; pansexual support, social, and educational group.
  • Midwest Submissive Discussion Group
  • Submission Of Love; submissive's support group
  • Decatur: BCI Pearls of Wisdom;
    A pansexual discussion group for people 21 years and older to discuss
    the realtime lifestyle of D/s and b/d/s/m living in central illinois
    and the surrounding areas. Monthly Munches.
  • Moline-Rock Island: Riverbound--Quad Cities BDSM
  • Rockford: REALM --Rockford and Extended Area Lifestyle Munch
  • Springfield:  L.I.N.K.S;
    Like-minded Individuals Networking for Knowledge and Satisfaction. We
    meet on the third Saturday of every month for a munch/social in a local
    restaurant. Members host their own private play parties and are by
    invitation only.






  • Alexandria: Central Louisiana BDSM mailing list, send email to CenLaBDSM@egroups.com.
  • Baton Rouge: Red Stick Volunteer Players
  • Lafayette: Acadiana Power Exchange
  • Lake Charles: BDSM_Lake_Charles; BDSM support and social group
  • New Orleans: Club Fem NOLA; Femdom - malesub group
  • NOBLE; non-profit pansexual support, play and social group
  • NOLA Bound; pansexual social group
  • Society les Femdommes; FemDomme group based in southeast Louisiana serving
    Female Dominants, male submissives and female submissives.
  • Shreveport: S_portdungeon; education & support group serving the Shreveport region and all of Northern Louisiana.
  • Delightful Dungeon; Pansexual D/s, BD S&M group in the Shreveport-Bossier City area.
  • Different Delights;
    pansexual 21& over support, education, and social group. Holds
    monthly munches, educational meetings, and coffee get togethers 3 times
    a month.
  • SWORD; Shreveport Women Of Regal Dominance, a fem Domme group and their subs, educating and supporting those in the Fem Dom lifestyle




  • Alston: The K.M. Society; P.O. Box 66, Alston MA 02134.
  • Boston:  Boston Burgermunch; email for info.
  • New England Dungeon Society
  • Common Bond; women's group, P.O. Box 390313, Boston MA 02139.
  • Bound For Pleasure; a New
    England BDSM social group that firmly believes in Safe, Sane and
    Consensual activities that will reflect on the B/D, D/S, S/M, Fetish
    and Alternative Lifestyle Communities in a healthy and positive light.
  • Defenders Boston: Catholic leather society, 55 E. Springfield St., Boston, MA 02118
  • New England NLA
  • One Nation Underground: information/ power exchange group for the BDSM/leather lifestyles
  • Boston-The Next Generation of Kinksters;
    pansexual BDSM group for motivated kinky individuals age 18-35 that is
    dedicated to education, outreach, and an enriching social environment
    within the leather community.
  • Braintree: SouthShore Munch; egroups list.  Holds a munch 1st and 3rd Sundays of the month.
  • Cambridge: MOB New England; Women's play and social
  • Charlestown: Boston United Leather Legion; A gay, lesbian, bi, and transgender group, P.O. Box 287, Charlestown MA 02129.
  • Hadley: Bound and Determined, women's group, P.O. Box 602, Hadley MA 01035.
  • Medford: Urania; women's group, P.O. Box 501, Medford MA 02155.
  • Northampton: East Coast FTM Group; P.O. Box 60585, Florence Station, Northampton, MA 01060
  • Links: pansexual group, meets monthly at Intimicies in downtown Northampton.
  • Northampton Alt; adult social group
  • North Dartmouth: FLAG (Fits Like A Glove); glove fetish organization, predominantly gay male, but it is not limited to men or gay.
  • Shelix; women's group, P.O. Box 416, Northampton, MA 01060-0416
  • Randolph: The Esoterica Society; P.O. Box 37, Randolph, MA 02368
  • Saugus: munch, contact Darkskyfire@aol.com for info
  • Springfield: The Western Massachusetts Power Exchange
  • WMPE-The Next Generation; for lifestylers 18-35.
  • WMPE Submissive Discussions; submissive only support group
  • Taunton: munch, held the 1st and 3rd Thursdays of the month.  Email Swtchr2@aol.com for info.
  • Waltham: Northeast Spanking Society; couples only group
  • Worcester: Worcester Women's Munch







« Last Edit: May 08, 2011, 12:16:13 PM by Lois » Logged


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Dominance, control, pleasure. Any questions?

« Reply #1 on: August 10, 2008, 05:17:19 PM »

 Sad  So little in my area.  Most of the sites are dead-ends...

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« Reply #2 on: August 29, 2008, 10:16:26 PM »

People, if you find something in your area that's not on the list above, SEND ME A PM and I'll add it to the list.

I'll also slowly go through it and change the dead links to italics.  Due to the nature of the Internet, you or I might just be having a temporary difficulty, and the original site may return in days/hours/week so I'm loathe to delete anything.


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« Reply #3 on: April 18, 2009, 11:29:17 PM »

i want to go to an event. one thats posted here. ive emailed the contact and havent received a reply. do i show up as a stalker...alone? whats appropriate?
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« Reply #4 on: April 19, 2009, 11:03:49 AM »

Tough call.... if it's a normal 'meet and greet' in a restaurant, I might go for it.  Worst that can happen is you dine alone.

Play parties are a different matter.  All of 'em that I've seen require a signed consent form, and many of them won't let you in the door unless you're a member and/or on their list.

Lots of groups have a set of rules & regs online.  If it says 'RSVP required' then I'd wait 'till next month, particularly if it's not held in a local restaurant or bar.

Don't forget that munches are fluid, and local scenes come and go ALL the time.  They may not have responded 'cos there's nobody there any longer.  The last update on Darkheart's list was December 2007, and already many of the events are now *ancient history*.  If the group you're looking at maintains a calendar and it's not merely a 'repeat every 2nd Wednesday of the month' kind of automated process, then odds are fairly good that the group contact person may have gotten REALLY busy all of a sudden.


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« Reply #5 on: April 19, 2009, 11:33:00 AM »

great, thanks.

it's at a restaurant and the link was current. i'll update in a few weeks and let every one know what a blast i had   Evil
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« Reply #6 on: September 27, 2009, 10:59:23 PM »

Wow.  DarkHeart must have finally fixed their domain problem... it's back again!  Though still sadly out of date on a lot of links.


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« Reply #7 on: May 07, 2011, 08:30:15 PM »

I have recently put a new site together for BDSM events. The URL is Official Event Locator - BDSM and I invite you to check it out. If you are an event organizer and would like to put your own events on the site, please write to me at admin@officialeventlocator.com and I will help you to get started - I'd love to have your events on the site.

I'd be willing to put a group/organization list together, similar to the Darkheart site. If there is interest, please write to me at the same address. As they say, we'll talk...

Thank you for trying my site.

Steve E.

Steve E.

Admin - http://www.officialeventlocator.com - For the promotion of BDSM events across the USA
             http://www.altfriendly.com - Business and professionals that will welcome your inquiries
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« Reply #8 on: May 07, 2011, 10:08:21 PM »

Hopefully your list will be maintained a bit better... 3/4ths of the groups in Darkheart's North Texas list are stone dead.  About the ONLY ones that still work are the Leather groups and the original dungeon.

# Dallas: Dallas BDSM; good source of bdsm info for the Dallas area.  (alive, but also woefully out of date with mostly dead links)
# The Sanctuary for Lifestyle Arts; dungeon facility  (alive and kicking)
# Bottoms Up; pansexual munches & play parties  (dead)
# The Bound Rose Society; pansexual BDSM group  (this link dead, moved to http://groups.yahoo.com/group/BoundRose/ and http://mstsboots.tripod.com/menu.htm )
# Different Strokes; email: board@differentstrokes.org  (dead)
# Fourth Fridays; bdsm happy hour, 4th Friday of every month  (dead)
# Flying W's; women's group, P O Box 345485, Dallas, TX 75234  (probably dead)
# Knot Just Leather: munch and playparty group  (dead)
# NLA-Dallas; P.O. Box 7597, Dallas TX 75209  (alive, think they have a real site by now)
# PEP-Dallas; Phone: (214) 504-8899 Email: dallaspep@hotmail.com  (unknown, with just a phone # and hotmail...)
# Southern Room Munch; monthly social group  (dead)
# WICK'D: Women In Control of Kink--Dallas; femdom and male sub group, meets 2nd saturday of every month.  (dead link, contact changed to wickddfw@aol.com)
# DFW Metro: Cruel Intentions; for the people who want to play rougher, louder, or closer to the edge.  (dead)

several newer groups exist since Darkheart's last real update, most of them shown on the Sanctuary calendar:

With the stunning success Darkheart shows for Dallas, I fully expect the rest of the list to be as well maintained... <that's sarcasm, kiddies>

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« Reply #9 on: May 07, 2011, 10:27:30 PM »

Thank you, Rope Fiend, for your post. It's hard to maintain sites such as Darkheart and DarkDesyres. Keeping track of the groups, doing the hand-coding - it's a big (and somewhat thankless) job. My site, as mentioned above, shows individual events and they are posted by the event organizers. So that part is up-to-date. I haven't quite figured out how to have a similarly dynamic and current list of organizations, but I am toying with some ideas. In the meanwhile, I continue to search for organizations to invite them to post their events on the site.

I will probably use the info in your reply post to contact organizations in the Texas area. Thank you for putting that info up. If you or anyone else knows of an organization that could benefit from using my current site, please pass the URL along. I can be contacted at admin@officialeventlocator.comfor assistance in getting started or for other, more general questions.


Steve E.

Admin - http://www.officialeventlocator.com - For the promotion of BDSM events across the USA
             http://www.altfriendly.com - Business and professionals that will welcome your inquiries
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« Reply #10 on: May 08, 2011, 09:14:51 PM »

BDSM Events Page:


You have to scroll down to see the current month.

So much oppression in our culture is based on shame about sex: the oppression of women, of cultural minorities, oppression in the name of the (presumably asexual) family, oppression of sexual minorities. We are all oppressed. We have all been taught, one way or another, that our desires, our bodies, our sexualities, are shameful. What better way to defeat oppression than to get together in communities and celebrate the wonders of sex?
The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities

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« Reply #11 on: February 09, 2013, 06:08:56 AM »

Now, this is just my personal opinion, but I believe that a lot of the links have a short shelf-life primarily because of the subject matter.  Remember, even though most people SAY that they are open-minded and have a "live-and-let-live" attitude, the old opinions still rule their worlds.  Many people seem to have the following attitudes:

SEX - Vanilla MF = Okay!  Hump away!
SEX - MM or FF = Err...  Okay!  Hump away!
SEX - Bondage MF = Uhm...  Well, as long as it's concensual...
SEX - D/S Relationship = Well, I have a problem with a woman/man being dominated...
SEX - Rape Fantasy = Ugh!  Do you know that, according to statisticts, 105% of all American women have been sexually harrassed blah blah blah...

Let's face it, we live in a society that tends to frown on our particular form of expression, and would love nothing more than to see us quietly fade away.  I think that a lot of the links tend to die because of pressure from outside the community.  Lord knows I've tripped over such things with Pennsylvania links...

"Sex is a contact sport.  If you don't need an ice pack and a physical therapist afterwards, you aren't doing it right."  DirtyDoc, 2011

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« Reply #12 on: October 30, 2013, 02:38:32 PM »

you hot women can munch on me anytime!
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« Reply #13 on: November 06, 2013, 12:21:22 AM »

The best way to find active groups in your area these days is to join FetLife.

So much oppression in our culture is based on shame about sex: the oppression of women, of cultural minorities, oppression in the name of the (presumably asexual) family, oppression of sexual minorities. We are all oppressed. We have all been taught, one way or another, that our desires, our bodies, our sexualities, are shameful. What better way to defeat oppression than to get together in communities and celebrate the wonders of sex?
The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
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« Reply #14 on: September 18, 2014, 09:05:14 AM »

what a fantastic page of resources.   High fives to all the work put in, in pulling all these great links together.

Rubberist, Informed Consent, Fetlife and Collarspace (was Collarme) are the sites I mostly frequent.

I also would add one more, that some of you may not yet have discovered.

Shiny Kicks: BDSM fetish bondage dating social network
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